When I first started my business, I used to be really annoyed by one coach. They had their finger in every.single.pie, even pies they ‘shouldn’t’ have been in, and it used to REALLY wind me up.
They were like a fire extinguisher, smothering the life out of anyone else’s attempts to raise their profile, become more visible or share their services, most-importantly MINE!!
When I finally got my head around the fact that Little Miss Fire Extinguisher was not going to change and my inner critic had begun screaming ‘you're not good enough’, ‘they’re so much better, why are you even bothering?’, I had to do something to make it go away.
So, I blocked them from my feed and the stress disappeared. Phew.
But...the story didn't end there.
LMFE had actually become a source of energy and ideas for my business; they were showing me how I could build my business (learning # eleventy-billion) but at the time, my judgement was so clouded by jealousy, I couldn’t see it.
And because I blocked them for so long, I ended up losing touch with some of the opportunities they were seeing that I wasn't (learning # eleventy-billion and one).
And because blocking, continued to be the anti-gift that kept on taking away, I also missed out on developing relationships with those who were ready to solve their problems but didn't want too work with LMFE, AND with those who were in that world, just not ready to invest yet (learnings galore on this...).
Blocking really did cause no end of lose, lose (and lose some more) outcomes, but in fairness, I didn't know there was another way.
So, what do I do now, if I notice the jealousy twinge?
I do this instead:
1. Accept them for who they are and what they’re doing without judgement – we’re all unique and all at different stages;
2. Know the stress is telling me something, so I need to dig into it:
a. Why do they irritate me so much?
b. What are they doing that really gets my goat?
c. What can I do differently with these insights?
And once the work is done, the stress goes.
However, if I notice the stress is still hanging around, I know there are either more things to learn, or I haven’t put the right actions in, so I'll have another crack at point 2.
But if you do the work, both you and your business will grow and this individual won’t bother you anymore (and with any luck, it won’t be long before someone else stresses you out with more insights to be had!).
For more performance and mindset hints, tips, tools and tricks, come and join us in my group, The Coaching Business Hub. As a coach you want to help people change their lives. The trouble is, building that coaching practice is proving harder than you thought... Join us for performance, mindset, marketing and business development tips, tools and tricks to help you ditch self-doubt, build your confidence and grow a business you love.